罪悪感を抱いたことのない人はいないと思います。皆多かれ少なかれ、罪悪感を感じて生きていますが、罪悪感が大きく、長く続くと、とても生き辛くなってしまいますね。
今日は罪悪感とは?そしてどう解消すればいいかについてお話したいと思います。
罪悪感とは
「自分が悪い」、「自分のせいだ」と、自分を責める感情で、そこには、「自分は罰を受けるべきだ」とか「なにか償わなくてはいけない」という気持ちが伴っています。
罪悪感を抱くに至るには主に2種類原因が考えられます。
「自分がしたことへの罪悪感」と「自分がしなかったことへの罪悪感」です
自分がしたことへの罪悪感: 仕事で大きなミスをして迷惑をかけた。ついかっとなって、怒ってしまった。暴力をふるってしまった。
自分がしなかったことへの罪悪感: 親孝行しなかった 困った人を助けることが出来なかった。すぐに行動しとけばよかったのに、できなかった。
どちらも、後悔し自分を責めます。
罪悪感を抱きやすい人は、責任感が強く、自己否定、自己肯定感が低いなどの傾向があります。
罪悪感の解消法
罪悪感をなくしていくには、起こったことに対しての見方を変えて、自分自身を許して行くことです。
あなたがしたこと、またはしなかったことで、何か悪い結果が生まれたと考えると、罪悪感が生まれます。
例えば、「あの人が困っているのに、助けてあげることが出来なかった」と罪悪感を抱いている時は、「助けなかったから、あの人は困ってしまった、傷ついてしまった、嫌な思いをしているんだろう」と思ってしまいます。
確かに、一時的には、その人は、困り、傷つき、嫌な思いをしたかもしれません。でも、もっと大きな視野で、人生を長い目で見た時に、その人は、そのことがあったからこそ、自力で窮地を切り抜ける能力がついたかもしれません。そのことがあったからこそ、困っている人がいたら助けてあげようと思って、優しい人になったのかもしれません。
怒ったり、暴力をふるったりしたなら、もちろん、それは自分自身が改善していくところです。ただ、物事の結果という物は、私たちの想像が及ばないところにあります。
一時的には悪い結果が出たように思えても、俯瞰で物を見るとうまくいっているのです。
自分自身のしてしまった事、しなかった事に反省したら、そのことからの学びを胸に刻んで、未熟だった自分を許し、相手の人にも何か学びがあり、それを学んで、全てうまくいっているのだと信じましょう。
悪い結果ではなくて、そこから生じた良い結果を考えてみて下さい。罪悪感はなくなります。
人間が使っている脳はほんの少しです。
私たちは皆未熟ですが、体験し、学び、成長するためにここにいます。
罪悪感を感じたら、自分の学びは何だろうと考え、ただそこに集中しましょう。相手の人も学びを得て、そこから成長できるのですから、罪悪感を感じる必要はありません。
「罪悪感の解消法とは?」への 76 件のコメント
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