良いコミュニケーション vs 悪いコミュニケーション　知っておくべき違いとは？

人間関係で大切なのはコミュニケーション。

実はいいコミュニケーションと悪いコミュニケーションがあるんです。

一番の違い、それは

コミュニケーションをとる時に、どんな感情をもっているのかということです。

その感情とは…　

不満

こんにちは、スピリチュアルカウンセラー　蒼乃ひろこです。

悪いコミュニケーションとは

怒っている時に、その不満を相手にぶつけながら、自分の言いたいことを言ってしまうことです。

「絶対自分の言ってることは正しいのに、全然聞いてもらえない！」
「自分が正しいのに逆切れされた！」
なんて経験ありませんか？

それは不満を持ったまま、「言いたいことを言ってやろう！」と相手に批判的になっているからです。

「そりゃ、そうだよ、不満だから、相手に一言言ってやりたいんだから！」
分かります。その気持ち。

でも、どれだけ自分が正しくても、相手を裁く気持ちがどこかにあると、相手は批判された気持ちになるので、反発して聞いてくれないんですね。

良いコミュニケーションとは

あなたの心が穏やかで、相手を批判する気持ちがなく、ただ自分の気持ちを伝えるということです。

誰が正しいとかではなく、ただ自分の気持ちを伝えると、相手は批判されたと思うことなく、ちゃんとあなたの言うことを聞いてくれます。

良いコミュニケーンのためのルール

不満を持っている時は話さない！

不満があり、批判の心でパンパンの時は、すぐにコミュニケーションを取ろうとせず、ちょっと待ってみましょう。

偉そうなことを言っていますが、実は私も昔は不満だらけのコミュニケーションをしていました。職場の方や友達にも怒りと不満を言ってやりたい！という意味のない正義感が強かったので、よく失敗しました。

不満を持って会話した結果起こったことは、、、人が離れていく。

不満を持っているので、どうしても言葉が批判的になり、相手の気持ちを傷つけてしまい、もう私とは話したくない、、、と思わせてしまったことが何度もあります。

その結果、信頼を失い、人は離れていきました。自分としては「言ってあげている」という正義感があり、得意になっていましたが、それが良くなかったと気づいたのは後になってからでした。

正しいことでは人は動かないことに気付き、不満や怒りは相手にぶつけず、自分の中で対処してから、相手に批判の心がない状態で話し始めた時、人が変わり始め、私に優しくなり、味方になってくれるようになりました。

良いコミュニケーションを意識し出してから、私の周りの人たちとの関わり方が変わってきて、お互いに優しい関係が作れるようになってきました。

もしあなたが、今、不満の気持ちを誰かに言ってやりたいという気持ちがあるなら、少し待ってみましょう。相手を批判する気持ちがなくなった時に、コミュニケーションを取れば、味方が増え、あなたを取り巻く環境が変わってくることを実感できます。

今までとは全然違う相手の反応が見れるかもしれません。楽しみですね。

知りたいと思いませんか？

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「良いコミュニケーション vs 悪いコミュニケーション　知っておくべき違いとは？」への 105 件のコメント

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