内向的は良くない?それ本当?

こんにちは、カウンセラーの蒼乃ひろこです。

私のカウンセリングのお客様には内向的で悩んでいる方が多く来られます。

一般的に、外向的で悩んでる、という方はあまりいない気がしませんか?

悩んでいるのはいつも内向的な方。
一体どうしてなんでしょう?

「外向的な方がいい」と思ってしまう大きな原因は、教育とメディアです

学校では「大きな声でみんなの前で発表できる子」は優秀とされ、成績もよくなります。

みんなの前で、発表できない内向的な子は「私は良くない」「私はダメなんだ」と無意識に思ってしまうんですね。

メディアもそうです。テレビに出ている人たちは、「自分を見て~」と出てきた外向的な人たち。

もちろん、内向的な人もいるだろうけど、そこはテレビの画面上では伝わらないので、外向的な人が活躍して、人気もあって、お金も稼いで…「あ~やっぱり外向的な人がいいんだな」「私はダメだ~」となってしまいます。

でも、本当に内向的な人はダメなんでしょうか?

内向的で成功した人はたくさんいます。

かのアインシュタインも内向的でした。
ビルゲイツも内向的だと言われています。

内向的な人の割合は30%位と言われており、日本人の場合は内向型の方が多いとも言われています。

でもなんだか、周りは外向的な人ばかりのような気がする。。。

実は、内向型と外向型の両方の性質を持った人もたくさんいます。

その人たちは、人と接するときは外向的になるので、内向的な部分が見えないからかも知れません。

私も両方の性質を持っています。人と話すときや、仕事の時は外向的に見えるかもしれませんが、その後どっと疲れ、一人でじっくり考えたりするのが好きな内向的な部分が出てきます。

私の昔の同僚も、すごく外向的な人だなと思っていたんですが、二人で話してみると、「実は私、内向的で…」と意外な一面を語ってくれびっくりしました。

内向的な人は、私だけ内向的で嫌だ。。。っと思っているかもしれませんが、実は内向的な人は周りにたくさんいるんですね。

そして、内向的な人は「私はダメだ。」「外交的になりたい」と思って、内向的な人のいいところを見落としがちですが、本当はいいところたくさんあるんです。

それは次回また。。。

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